:: Monday, January 10, 2005 ::

Edmund Spenser’s The Shepherd’s Calendar consists of 12 "eclogues", beginning with January and ending with December. What makes this interesting is that at the time the calendar year did not begin on January 1st, but on March 23rd. While the New Year was associated with spring, renewal, birth, growth, Spenser decided to open not only with cold and drear, but at a time when the warmth of Spring was still months away.

So bear with my little English Lit regurgitation. Spenser did this to highlight discontent. Discontent: thus, we have resolutions. We turn over our metaphorical leaves at a time when we feel they are the dirtiest. We spend too much money at Christmas and resolve to budget. We indulge our taste buds throughout December and resolve to diet and exercise. We get drunk at holiday parties and put our feet in our mouths and resolve to drink less and treat people better.

I’m not so sure it would be any different in spring, though. Perhaps we’d be distracted by warmth and sex and possibilities, but we’d probably just be more panicked about bathing suit season. And how tiring is it? To focus so much on what we don’t like about ourselves? To take ourselves apart and decide which pieces need to be refurbished?

To form an obvious metaphor: if part of a car needs fixing, the whole thing gets parked in the garage. So why do we think we can just remove parts of ourselves and keep driving? It’s unrealistic and frankly, a bit boring.

I am always going to be a messy person, to varying degrees. I am always going to spend a little bit beyond my means, eat a few more cookies than I should, and spend a little too much time in front of this computer screen.

And the only tragedy in that would be if I sat around worrying about it.


~song~ Neil Young - My My Hey Hey

:: Katy 1:00 a.m. [+] :: ::