a few days ago i wrote this big convoluted post which i didn't like and took down. essentially, in about nine paragraphs, all it said was this: how can you expect anyone to respect what you do if you don't respect it yourself? i'm still working on the answer to that one.
i feel awful right now. i feel like everything is going wrong and i have nobody special to support me. i'm lonely.
this is not a cry for sympathy, so, if i still have any readers, please don't post sympathy notes in the comments. i just feel like putting it out there.