:: Wednesday, November 20, 2002 ::

I used my fake ID for the last time the other night. Yes, that's right, it's my birthday in 4 days. Officially 19. And you all better be buying me big fat presents.

I've been such a hermit lately I forgot how fun it is to go out. It was especially fun to get to spend a little time with my dearest Kaitlin. We're getting a house in the summer and staying in the city and I'm so excited - yet it scares the crap out of me. I've never been in a city in the summer. I'm used to being able to get off work and go hop in the lake. I'm used to the outdoors, to grass, to trees, to the ocean. It'll definately be a different experience being stuck in a concrete jungle in the summer heat.

I think it'll be good not to live with my parents. For their benefit more than mine. What is it about being with your parents that makes you act like you're twelve? I think I said it best in my Grade 12 journal: Intellectually, I know they're right and I'm wrong. Yet, emotionally, I cannot help but feel that they are being SO UNREASONABLE. I mean, look guys, I COULD clean up my dishes, which would take maybe 3 minutes, but can't you see that I am INCREDIBLY busy here playing minesweeper? C'mon, I still haven't beaten 55 seconds in intermediate mode and I just HAVE to or I'll DIE and why can't you just understand that you terrible, heartless freaks? Now I think I'll waste the rest of my night CRYING into my pillow hormonally because I cannot comprehend of the tragedy that is my life.

Either that or go smoke enough pot with my friends that I forget the dishes still haven't been done.

I have little motivation to go home at this point anyway. The city offers so much stuff that I'd love to be able to take advantage of. The time I feel the most sad about not being home is when I'm there, if that makes any sense. It's funny how you can love a place so much, you feel homesick before you've left.

I'm definately not a city girl at heart. But I wouldn't mind being a city girl right now.

To finish: Is this the sickest quiz ever? I never thought of myself as the hanging kind...



how would you commit suicide?

(listening to: Tom Waits - The Heart of Saturday Night)

:: Katy 3:16 p.m. [+] :: ::